Masquerade
by LoveSimonFicWriter
Summary: AU where Simon and Blue have been messaging for a year straight without blackmail. It's now senior year, and Blue may actually have the courage to reveal himself. A Halloween Masquerade party may give them the chance they have been waiting for. Will they both go through with it? Will one chicken out at the last minute? Enjoy! More Information Inside/A/N!
1. Does This Mean!

A/N: Hey Guys! Here is a story I just decided to start up tonight. I got the idea really late, and wanted to run with it. So hopefully it's good. It's 1 am and I wrote this little bit in only an hour. There will be more obviously, but this acts as a little 'teaser' if you will. Enjoy! Let me know if you want more! **ALSO: GIVE ME SOME SUPERHERO DUO'S FOR COSTUME IDEAS!**

 **Description:** AU where Simon and Blue have been messaging for a year straight without blackmail. It's now senior year, and Blue may actually have the courage to reveal himself. A Halloween Masquerade party may give them the chance they have been waiting for. Will they both go through with it? Will one chicken out at the last minute? Basically this story takes place a year since they have started emailing. _Meeting_ has been talked about and they are granted the perfect opportunity to do so. No one is being blackmailed, but they still are both faces problems with coming out. Angst, definitely romance, and a lot of fluff towards the end. Enjoy everyone!

Title: Masquerade

Chapter 1

FROM: Hour to Hour. Note to Note

TO: bluegreen118

DATE: October 29 at 7:36 PM

SUBJECT: Are You Going?

Dear Blue,

How is it that the store down the street from me has sold out of Halloween Oreo's already? Like…I'm wondering if that is even a thing this close to Halloween. Shouldn't they be restocking the shelves every night with them? They had plenty of Reese's cups though, so you wouldn't have been as disappointed as I was.

I was thinking about you today…God, that sounds creepy, but if I said I was 'daydreaming' about you, that would make me sound completely juvenile. I don't know- maybe I am. Who is to say? I was thinking about you because in a few days I'm going to a Masquerade party on Halloween, and it dawned on that we'd all be wearing masks of some kind. It's not like something out of Romeo and Juliet's time with those terrifying excuses for masks, but we are told to dress appropriately, so it's hard to guess who we really are.

Aaand…. now I'm explaining the concept of Masquerade parties to the smartest person I know like he has no idea what I'm talking about…sometimes I wonder about myself, and why you like to talk to me...

So, getting to the point cause you're probably sooo bored of reading this fail of an email- but the other day we were discussing the idea of one day getting to actually meet…I was wondering if you were going to the party, and if so- would you maybe consider meeting for the first time? I completely understand if it's too much-too fast, but I can't stop thinking about you, Blue, and how much I want to put a face, and a voice to the words on my computer screen. Just let me know what you think about that…you can be totally honest too.

Love, Jacques

P.S. If you want- we could wear matching costumes ;)

* * *

FROM: bluegreen118

TO: Hour to Hour. Note to Note

DATE: October 29 at 9:08 PM

SUBJECT: Re: Are You Going?

Jacques,

*GASP* How could they run out of Halloween Oreo's? What a tragedy! You're right, I would have settled for the Reese's if it came down to it. I can't say I would not have choice words for the customer service desk though. They would be getting an ear full for sure.

You were thinking about me, huh? It's not creepy at all cause I'm sure the amount of time spent thinking about you should be illegal- so who's really the creepy one? Yes, we did talk about meeting one day, and yes two days from now does seem pretty fast considering. I know I promised that I no longer wanted to keep my identity a secret from you, but I'm still trying to work up the courage to come out to certain people. My parents know, but my best friend and friend group have yet to find out. I rather tell them first before I start bringing you around…if that were something you'd even be interested in doing- I mean, of course it is cause you've only been saying how much you want to get to know the people I talk about.

I don't know, Jacques… it still seems a little too difficult to come out to you. I'm not sure I'm ready for things to change completely. I know it seems stupid, and I sound kind of selfish, but I don't want to disappoint you…even though I'm pretty sure declining your invite to meet one another is disappointing in itself. I'm kind-a, sort-a, maybe afraid you might not be ecstatic to know who I really am and then it would ruin what we have together. Is it crazy of me to think that way?

I'm truly sorry, Jacques, if this is not the answer you were looking for, but maybe sometime soon? I need time to tell my friends, and then I'm sure after that happens I might find that confidence I seem to be lacking. Let me think on it, okay?

Love, Blue

P.S. If we did go forward with it, what would we go as?

* * *

FROM: Hour to Hour. Note to Note

TO: bluegreen118

DATE: October 29 at 10:12 PM

SUBJECT: What Would We Go As?

Blue,

Okay, I can definitely see why you would want to wait cause I definitely want to meet your group of friends. I also want for you to meet mine, so maybe I should consider doing the same? Only one of my friends knows, but they promised to not say anything until I was ready. I don't know what I did to deserve such a good friend.

But yeah, I want to know everything there is about you, and if I have to wait a little longer, I don't see the harm in that. When you're ready, we will meet. I hope it's soon- but I'm not pushing…I'm a little bit of a pusher if you haven't already figured that out…but I try to tone it down around you.

I think it's adorable that you think of me that much…and actually makes me relieved to know you DO still like me. You're not selfish at all, if anything you're the logical thinker, I think I know you to be. You're trying to make sure everything falls into place, and I get it. It makes perfect sense.

To be honest- meeting you terrifies the ever-loving shit out of me. Don't get me wrong, I'll be so looking forward to the day it finally happens, but I guess I feel the same way. I'm afraid I might not be the person you want me to be, or worse- you might not be attracted, but still have the emotional connection. I guess the question still remains- if we met right now, what would you be looking for? I know what I would want, but you don't have to answer that right now! It's not important.

I feel like I'm rambling, so I'll try to bring this to a close in as few words as possible:

Blue, you inspire me everyday to be the best I can be. You've done more for me than you will ever know. You are not crazy- you are smart, and beautiful and probably the bravest person I know. I've been talking to you for a total of a year or so, and over that time I've fallen madly in love with you. I don't care what you look like- you're always going to be Blue to me, no matter what. So yes, please think on it cause meeting you is all I want to do.

Love, Jacques

P.S. Maybe superhero duo?

* * *

FROM: bluegreen118

TO: Hour to Hour. Note to Note

DATE: October 30 at 1:26 AM

SUBJECT: Re: What Would We Go As?

Jacques,

It's all I want to do too... Ok, I basically have two days to gain the confidence I need to do this. Halloween is Friday, and that gives us hardly any time to find matching costumes, but I'm willing to try my best if you are?

Love, the creepy thinker who can't stop dreaming about kissing the guy behind the mask

* * *

FROM: Hour to Hour. Note to Note

TO: bluegreen118

DATE: October 30 at 1:35 AM

SUBJECT: …Does this mean?

Blue,

I legit have the nervous sweats over here…are you saying what I think you're saying?

Love, the guy behind the mask who honestly can't keep cool right now

* * *

FROM: bluegreen118

TO: Hour to Hour. Note to Note

DATE: October 30 at 1:48 AM

SUBJECT: Re: …Does this mean?

Jacques,

…Did you have a duo in mind?

Love, Blue

P.S. Maybe something in spandex? ;P

* * *

 **A/N:** Hope you guys enjoyed this little teaser, let me know what you think! **GIVE ME SOME SUPERHERO DUO'S FOR COSTUME IDEAS IN A REVIEW OR PM, THANKS!**


	2. It's Up To You, Blue

A/N: Here is chapter 2 guys! Enjoy! I hope you all enjoy! I considered everyone's suggestions and went with what fits their personalities best/ also what worked for the idea best as well. More to come!

 **PSA: To those that have been reading... I made a mistake and I'm so grateful it was caught. In chapter one- Bram/blue admitted to being out to his parents AND best friend, but he's not supposed to be out to Garrett yet as you can see in this chapter. Sorry for the confusion...that's what happens when you're working on no sleep, and multiple works at once! Has since been fixed! Lol enjoy guys!**

Title: Masquerade

Chapter 2

Simon's Point Of View:

The second I got to lunch I was on edge. I'd been thinking about it all night and how I was going to do it. This is for Blue- I have to. I've never wanted anything more in my entire life. To finally know Blue would be everything.

I looked around the table and observed my friends. Abby was already in deep over a discussion about the cafeteria's inability to supply strawberry milk with Nick, while Leah looked uninterested. Garrett and Bram were sitting with us again today, and I couldn't help but notice how extra quiet Bram was. He hardly talks as it is, but even Garrett couldn't get him to keep a conversation going. He seemed troubled, and that's when I realized I was staring hardcore at both of them. Bram had glanced up and caught my eye. I quickly dipped my head, back to the attention of my soggy pizza.

"Simon," Abby announced my name, facing me. My eyes made a B-line for her face, hoping to avoid seeing Bram all over again.

"Yeah?" I asked.

"Don't you think it's crazy that they can have disgusting things such as vanilla milk, but strawberry is too 'difficult' to obtain?" she rambled.

"Uh, I guess," I shrugged.

"Ugh, Simon. You're supposed to be helping me here!" Abby groaned, but before I could mistake her for actually being upset with me, she winked, and pushed her finger into my cheek.

"You okay, you seem kind of out of it?" Leah whispered over the table.

"Yeah, for once you're more quiet than Bram," Nick joked. Bram didn't seem to take offence, and managed a small smile. It faded quickly, and for a split second he looked like he wanted to say something, but for some reason this felt like the best time for me to say what I was thinking.

"Um, guys. What is everyone doing after school today?" I ask. Bram seems shut down, but I'm not sure why.

"Nothing for me," Leah responded. Abby shrugs and flips her hand toward Leah.

"Same, I don't have anything planned. Why, what's up?" she asks.

Just say it, Simon-"I was wondering if you guys wanted to hit up waffle house tonight?" I ask. "Let's say, seven?" I suggest. Okay…not what I meant.

Abby and Leah look at each other and nod.

"Uh, Si, the guys and I are actually going to be at Garrett's tonight. But I'm sure you're more than welcome to come too?" Nick announces, looking between Garrett and I.

"Oh, yeah. I don't mind! More the merrier!" Garrett chimes. "Mini party!" he hollers.

"Did someone say party?" A random student hollers from another table. Garrett leans back, gripping the table with his fingertips.

"Not you, freshy!" he spats, pulling himself upright again.

Great.

"Yes! Let's go!" Abby enthusiastically agrees. Leah glances at me for an out, but I need everyone together- so sure. I guess Garrett and Bram are part of our group, right? They only sit with us sometimes, but I guess it has been more so than not lately. They deserve to know about me- from me.

"Yeah, let's do it." I nod, and Leah rolls her eyes at me. I apologize with the tap of my foot under the table, but she ignores me.

* * *

FROM: hourtohour . notetonote

TO: bluegreen118

DATE: October 30 at 3:42 PM

SUBJECT: I Think We Should Go As…

Dear Blue,

I'm thinking today might be our last day to get costumes, so I think we should decide before it's too late and we have to go as crayons. For you it would work…but how would I go about picking a color? Just kidding. Anyway, I've been thinking about it, and here are the options:

1\. If we want to be fully covered: Spiderman and Deadpool

2\. If we want to show some skin: Barry Allen, and Wally West

That's all I got for ideas so far, so hopefully one of those appeal to you. If you have a better idea, let me know ASAP cause I'll try to go before the store closes tonight.

Love, Jacques

P.S. I'm going to do it tonight. I'm going to tell them. I'm both terrified, and relieved that it's finally time. Good luck tonight, if you plan on telling your friends tonight as well. You can do it, I believe in you!

* * *

Leah, Abby and I got to Garrett's and his mom walked us down into the basement, where they were already playing video games on the floor in front of the TV. His mom cleared her throat once we reached the bottom of the stairs and Garrett craned his neck back to see us standing there awkwardly beside his mom.

"Oh, hey guys!" he threw his arm in the air with a wave. His mom left us, and went back to whatever it was she was doing upstairs.

"How's it goin'?" he asks, looking at the three of us.

"Fine," Leah shrugs a shoulder and takes a seat on the couch.

"O-kay," Garrett slowly nods. He faces Nick and tells him to turn the game off.

"I guess we'll find something we can all do, huh?" Garrett asked with his hands on his hips.

"Like?" Nick asks, coming over to stand by Abby. She leans into him slightly, and I can see the roll of Leah's eyes from across the room.

"I don't know. We could always sit and talk," Garrett suggests.

"How about we play two truths and a lie?" Nick flips his palms up. Okay…that's actually too perfect.

"Greenfeld you start," Garrett elects poor Bram to begin the game. The look of horror on his face was discomforting. We all take a seat on the floor, in a circle, around Garrett's coffee table.

"I'll start!" Abby offers up, noticing the ill look on Bram's face as well. Garrett waves his hand toward her to proceed and she takes a seat on the floor- followed by the rest of us.

"Okay, so I have an aunt who lives in England," she starts, placing a finger to her chin. She taps it slowly as she thinks, and looks to the ceiling for help. "I once had a pet turtle, and yesterday I totally ran a red light."

"Abby…those were the worst choices for two truths and a lie I have ever heard," Garrett blinked.

"Shut up, they were all I could think of! Now pick out the lie!" she demanded.

"I say the Turtle thing," Nick spoke up.

"Ran a red light," Leah said.

"I'm going with ran a red light," I added.

"Hmm," Garrett thought, mimicking Abby with tapping a finger to his chin. "You don't have an aunt in England!"

"Bram?" Abby asks toward him. He looks up from his phone and blushes.

"Sorry, I wasn't listening," he confessed, going back to his phone.

"Ugh, you're out this round. I'm not repeating it. Anyway, Nick's right. I never had a turtle. I did however run a red light, and my aunt Sue lives in England. She met her husband on a trip and now lives there with him and their two kids."

"Boooor-ing, give me something good! Spier, you're up!" Garrett hollered with his hands cupped around his lips like a mega phone.

"Isn't Nick supposed to go? He guessed correctly," I sputtered, directing the attention in Nick. Garrett bats his hand at Nick and turned back to me. "Nah, he never has good ones either," Garrett shook his head.

"Hey!" Nick protested. This is it- here is your chance.

"Um, okay." I nod, noticeably nervous at this point- I had to be. "So…I can speak French pretty well," I begin.

"What's pretty well?" Garrett asks. I blink at him and my mouth falls open.

"I don't know…like I'm pretty fluent in it?" I question.

"Oh, okay," he narrows his eyes at me, hugging his knees to his chest. I shake my head lightly, trying to understand his question and proceed with, "I'm six foot two, and," I think about it a moment. Do I go all out? I feel like I have to- like this is too perfect of an opportunity. "And…I'm gay," I felt like I mumbled that last part. As the word slipped out of my mouth, Leah's head popped up, and so did Abby's. Shit I forgot Abby knows…crap. I look around just to see everyone's reactions, and Bram is staring at me with this bewildered expression. I almost wanted to look behind me to make sure there wasn't a ghost with the way he seemed shocked.

"Uh, shit…okay…well, I'm six-foot two…" Garrett's voice trails off. "I've also never heard you speak another language, so… the gay thing?" he answers, but doesn't sound confident. _It's okay Garrett- it won't hurt my feelings if you think I'm gay._

"No…he speaks perfect French…" Leah mutters. "Si…did you just-"

"Come out? Yeah…" my heart is racing like never before. I feel like I just ran a marathon in under five seconds flat. My hands were trembling, and every part of me felt weak. There were no words, but Abby seemed to have this proud look on her face. The look I shot her read perfectly clear and she gave a slight nod that no one else could see.

"Simon, I'm so happy for you! That must have taken a lot of guts!" Abby plays off, getting up to hug me. I hug her back and it's comforting for a moment. Leah is still in shock, and Nick looks confused.

"Wait…you're gay?" he finally speaks.

"Y-yeah…I am," I nod. "I'm gay," I say and it rolls off my tongue effortlessly. Suddenly it doesn't feel as scary anymore after saying it aloud twice with people present- my friends even.

"Simon…Well, good for you bud, I'm happy for you. When did you know?" Garrett asked.

"Uh…only a little while ago…" I shrug, trying to play it off like I haven't been living like this forever. Leah still has yet to say anything, and Bram…well I can't justify his reaction because he's always quiet and I'm not sure how he's taking it. He seems kind of bothered by it…and I truly hope this doesn't offend him.

"I'm sorry I kept it under wraps for so long…it was just something I had to feel out, ya know?" I say to them.

"Of course, we totally understand that!" Garrett agrees. He looks at Bram a moment, and they exchange glances. Bram cowers into his phone, and ignores everyone's comments. Sometimes I wonder what makes him so anti-social.

"Si…I," Leah begins but she interrupts herself by getting up and walking toward the stairs. She waits a moment, but then disappears up the stairs.

"Leah!" I call out to her. "Let me go talk to her. I'll be right back," I said, excusing myself awkwardly. I'm outside Garrett's house where I find Leah staring at the street. Her arms are crossed over her chest and her eyes are red rimmed.

"Leah…" I speak up, placing a hand to her shoulder. She shrugged me off forcefully and I'm almost worried she gave herself whiplash.

"You could have told me that in private first before telling the whole world, Si."

"Leah I-"

"Look," she faces me, "I'm not trying to take away from your moment, but I-" Her words come to a halt, and she wants to say something else, but she shakes it out of my her head. "This is important, but _because_ it's important I figured you would have told me something like this in private before announcing it to the world." She frowned.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner. I just wasn't ready…look I honestly don't think I would have been so ready to do this if it weren't for…well the guy I'm into."

"You're into someone? Does he go to our school?" Leah questions, tucking a piece of loose hair behind her ear.

"He does," I blush, thinking about Blue. "I call him Blue because that's what he signs his emails, and-"

"His emails? What emails?"

"I've been talking to him through email for about a year now. We have so much in common Leah, and I'm so excited to meet him…but basically we promised each other we would come out to our friends so we wouldn't have to hide once we meet," I explain. She appears uncertain, and the corner of her mouth quirks up.

"Are you sure he's real? Like he didn't just make you out yourself before you were ready as a way to play with you?"

"What? No! He wouldn't do that! He's going to come out to his friends tonight too," I defended him. Leah crossed her arms over her chest and sighed.

"I don't know, Si…when do you plan to meet this kid?"

"Tomorrow night, at the masquerade party," I state, hesitantly.

"At the party? Okay, well I just want you to be careful. Can I be there? Like in the background so I can make sure nothing goes wrong?"

"If you want, I wouldn't mind," I shrug, looking down at my shoe.

"I won't say anything, but I want to make sure you're safe. I don't need some weirdo in a mask carting you off and then I never see you again." She smirks, dropping her arms at her sides.

"I appreciate it," I smile. She steps toward me, and I can tell her anger hasn't lifted.

"Don't keep secrets from me ever again, and if you have to- tell me first!" she points a finger at me, before going in for a hug. I hold her tight and rest my cheek on her head.

"Okay, I promise," I smile contently. We break away and Leah starts back to the house.

"As long as you tell me things too," I press. Leah turns around and shoots me a pointed look.

"…What would I keep from you?" she asks.

"That's for you to tell me," I shrug, walking past her. She follows and stays quiet behind me. We get back inside Garrett's basement and my phone alerts me of an email. Leah steps passed me down the stairs and goes to join everyone again. They've been talking amongst themselves while we were gone, and stopped when Leah approached them. I sat on the step to read my email, and heavy flutters erupted in my chest when I saw Blue's address. My muscles tensed immediately when I read the subject, though:

'Can we talk about this?'

I don't want to open it, but I need to. I need to know what he has to say. I just hope I'm over thinking it, and maybe it's meant positively? Ugh…what if he changed his mind and he no longer wants to meet? What the hell would I do? I already came out to my friends! He should have enough courage to do it to at this point!

Okay, Simon- don't get angry before you know the whole story… I take a deep breath and opened the email.

* * *

FROM: bluegreen118

TO: hourtohour . notetonote

DATE: October 30 at 5:04 PM

SUBJECT: Can we talk about this?

Jacques,

I don't know what to say…but today has been a little weird for me. I don't know what to do, and I'm not sure coming out to you right now is the best idea. It's not something you did, but…well, I think I might know who you are, and when you find out who I am, I don't think you're going to like it very much.

I'm sorry… I don't think I can do it. I'm so, so sorry. Please don't hate me.

-Blue

* * *

I think my heart just fell out my ass. What the hell? He figured me out, but he doesn't have the decency to say whom he thinks I am- or to meet me?!

* * *

FROM: hourtohour . notetonote

TO: bluegreen118

DATE: October 30 at 5:10 PM

SUBJECT: Re: Can we talk about this?

Blue,

Um…okay? Well, I mean you say it's not me, but do you really think I'm not going to take it personally that you've decided not to come out to me because you think you know who I am? That's not okay, Blue…at least tell me who you think I am- Maybe if you knew the answer to that, you'd feel better about coming out to me.

Did you tell your friends at least?

Love, Jacques

* * *

I slip my phone back in my pocket, and join the rest of the group. They've abandoned the game due to my thrilling coming out showstopper and moved onto simple gossip. We got on the subject of people in theater, and then Bram got up to use the bathroom. Garrett got on the subject of Martin Addison and how he finds the kid to be a 'bizarre little fella', which got Abby going. He's been after her since she got to this school, and she wants nothing of it. Nick seemed annoyed at the comments, but didn't have a word to say about it.

Curiosity was killing me, and I needed to get a message back from Blue. It was taking way too long. Either that, or he's truly ignoring me. Great- now he's ignoring me, _because_ of me.

That's a pure confidence booster right there, if you ask me…

* * *

FROM: bluegreen118

TO: hourtohour . notetonote

DATE: October 30 at 5:25 PM

SUBJECT: I'm sorry

I know it's you, and I don't need validation to make my decision. I got it today once everything seemed to click. I'm sorry Simon, I can't meet you- not yet. I'm sorry if it makes me a coward, but I need some time to sort things out. I hope you can forgive me…

-Blue

* * *

We were so close…so close to maybe being something so perfect and I go and ruin it somehow. Seriously, how is this my fault? How did he _make_ it my fault? I slid my phone back into my pocket and forget even checking it again. I'm just mad at this point, and I want nothing more than to go home and hide away in my room.

"Hey, are you guys alright if I go…something just came up, and I need to take care of it," I say, standing from my spot on the ground. Leah looks up at me curiously and everyone's attention is on me.

"Yeah, sure Spier…we didn't do anything to make you uncomfortable, right?" Garrett asks, looking at everyone.

"Oh, no! No, I just really need to get home and help my dad with something. You guys are fine, and honestly I couldn't ask for better friends to come out to. So thank you for being so understanding." I smile warmly at them before jutting my thumbs behind me. "I'm gonna head out. Nick can you give the girls a ride?" I ask. He nods, and waves me goodbye.

I turn on my heels, and head for the stairs. Once outside, and in my car I feel like breaking down, but I don't. I hold it in for as long as I can.

Bram's Point of View:

Before descending back into the cave of Garrett's basement, I slipped my phone into my pocket and sighed. I hit the last step with a lazy thud and twisted my hand over the banister.

"I don't know, he said he was going to try to meet this kid tomorrow, but he doesn't know who it is," Leah was speaking to the group. I only picked up on the conversation once I realized Simon was missing.

"Hey, where is Simon?" I spoke up, approaching my spot.

"He bailed. He said he had to help his dad with something, but he looked kind of upset," Nick explained.

"Upset? About what?" I asked, trying to be casual.

"I think it has to do with what I said to him," Leah sighed, resting against the edge of the couch.

"What did you say?" Abby asked.

"I told him to be careful, and to not let this guy take advantage of him. I might have scared him."

"Guy?" I asked, looking at everyone. Garrett shot me a look and then rolled his eyes.

"Yeah- Spier is gay did you forget that? It only happened like five minutes ago…" Garrett smirked.

"No, I just didn't know what you were talking about." My voice was small.

"Leah says that Simon has been talking to some guy for a year, but he only goes by a nickname and won't come out to Simon."

"I didn't say he wouldn't come out- they have plans to meet tomorrow," Leah corrected.

"Oh…well, okay," I nod.

"What else did he say about him?" Nick asked.

"I don't know. Our conversation was sort of short, but I think he's really into him. He was so excited when he talked about meeting him," Leah explains. I feel it all at once- the horrible stabbing of the metaphorical knife right through my chest. Smack dab over my heart. How could I be such an asshole to him?

"I don't know…I just don't want to see him get hurt," Leah frowned.

"Yeah, me either. Anyone who goes out of his way to hurt Simon is a piece of shit in my book. He doesn't deserve it. He's such a nice kid." Garrett answers, and I glare at him. He has no idea I'm Blue, or that I'm gay. When I got here, Nick was already playing video games with Garrett and I didn't feel comfortable telling Nick yet. I wanted Garrett to know first, and I honestly don't know why it has taken me so long to come out to him. I have my reasons for not wanting to tell Simon tomorrow, but now I'm wondering if those reasons are really that important.

"Can we change the subject? I feel like we're gossiping about him now," Abby shakes her head, turning away from the subject of Simon. Thank god.

"Yeah…I'm just worried. Maybe I should text him," Leah continues to frown and pull out her phone.

"Or maybe he's really helping his dad?" I offer up. She shrugs and continues to type a mile a minute into her phone.

"Or not," I mumble to myself. I pull out my own phone and see if I have any messages from him from my last email. Still no response- he is really upset with me. And rightfully so- I'm an asshole.

It's not that I don't want to be out to Simon because every part of me would love to call him my boyfriend, but I guess the only thing holding me back is our friend group. What if we don't work out? Do I risk being the reason we can no longer be friends with everyone? Garrett just got done telling me how much he loves hanging out with them and that's why we've been sitting at the table more. He feels accepted by them, and why shouldn't he? We all get along so well…so what if I ruin that? Not even _just_ that…what if he see's it's me and realizes he doesn't want me to be Blue? Maybe he'll be expecting someone else, and then get's so disappointed that he starts to hate me? I know I'm being over the top, but these are serious concerns.

Knowing Simon is Jacques is probably the best thing to happen to me. The crush I've had since freshman year of high school is turning out to be the love of my life…who else would this happen to? …And I'm about to blow it like a fucking moron. Holy shit. I can't let Simon go- not after what we've been through…not after what he did for me-

OH MY GOD- he came out to his friends for me… he told them and I can't even muster up the courage to meet him still? Oh, Bram- Abraham Louis Greenfeld- I'm so disappointed in you.

Garrett suggests we change the subject of Simon as well and moves onto playing a game. We play about three rounds of Cards Against Humanity, but it's interrupted on my end when my phone chimes. My heart goes into a frenzy immediately. I don't want to see who the email is from, but I know right away it's Simon. I look down and see his address. I open the email and begin reading it.

I jump up from the floor in shock of the words on my screen, and realize everyone is staring at me.

"Sorry, I have to go." I say, rubbing my hands down the front of my jeans.

"Uh, okay. You alright, buddy?" Garrett asks, eyeing me up and down. I nod, and rush for the stairs.

"Yeah, I'll see you guys at school tomorrow. I forgot I have a paper due tomorrow in English." I say, stepping onto the first step before being stopped by Nick's voice.

"Wait…we have a paper due?" Nick spazzes, turning around with wide eyes. Oh, right.

"Oh, uh. Did I say English?" I ask, stalling to come up with something better.

"Uh, yeah!" Nick spastically throws his hands out.

"Oh, I meant world history," I laugh, starting up the steps again.

"Wait- what!" Abby freaks out. Oh come on!

"Not world history…uh…oh, um…" All eyes are on me, and Garrett looks oddly suspicious of me. "Oh, I don't know! I have a paper due- bye!" I yell back, running up the stairs.

I dart out to my civic and it feels like I'm running out of time.

Simon's Point of View:

I'm driving around town when I see the Halloween stores lights bright as day, just ahead of me.

"Fucking Blue," I mumble, passing the store. "You can't even tell me who you are?!" I holler. I pound the steering wheel with my palm a few times before gripping it and bellowing out a startling growl.

"FUCK!" I scream once more. I can feel my nostrils flaring as I grit my jaw. I'm thinking about it too much, and I just want to forget about him. I drive to the grocery store, and run into the Oreo isle. I scan the shelves for double stuffed and somehow they are all out. My eyes narrow in on the Oreo's with the orange frosting and my nostrils begin flaring again.

 _The Halloween one's are my favorite…_

It plays through my head in a loop. I can't shake anything Blue even if I wanted too. I grab the stupid package and a pint of milk and go to sit in my car outside the store. I get through a row of the cookies, and realize this is maybe what heartbreak feels like. It's so stupid of me to be mad at someone over my computer, but it's not just someone anymore…he's Blue…he's my Blue. We were going to know each other and now for whatever reason- he doesn't want too.

Okay, so he figured out it was me…fine, but saying 'It's not you' _always_ means 'it's you'. I don't care if he doesn't find me attractive, he could have just said that.

I start to impersonate in a random, condescending tone of voice before shoving a cookie into my mouth, "Hey, Si, I figured out it was you and well…you're just not my type…like you wear glasses, and you're kind of dorky and I was hoping for someone other than you, but here we are- so."

I chew urgently and take deep breaths through my nose. I rest my head back against the headrest as I close my eyes. Just forget him- Simon. He wants to be this way, fine…be this way.

"Ugh…FUCK!" I scream for the millionth time that night. I turn my key, and back out of my spot swiftly and try not to sideswipe the car beside me. I'm speeding down the street, back toward the Halloween store, praying I don't get pulled over. I swing into a spot right in the front, and jump out. They are open late tonight for last minute costumes, but I want to get in there before all the good costumes are gone and I'm left trying to figure out what to wear.

When I walk in, I shoot for the superhero section and scan the isle for the costume. I look at the Flash costumes, but of course nothing is in my size. I look for the Green Lantern and again- only smalls.

"Hi, do you have this in a large, in the back?" I ask, holding up the green packaging to the women walking by. She shakes her head and states that whatever is on the floor is what we have.

"Shit," I mumble to myself. I get further down and start picking up random stuff just to see sizing. I turn down the next isle and of course the only options left are He-Man, Thor, and the Hulk…I'm supposed to go dressed as a giant green monster? Don't think so. I pick up the Thor costume and look it over. To my surprise, behind it was a stack of comic book-like Deadpool costumes. I pick it up and smile at the sizes. They have the costume, and it's going to fit me…

Okay…maybe it's a sign, but I can't be sure. I grab the costume and take it to the register. I pay for it and head home once I've made sure I truly want to do this. When I get to my bedroom, I throw open my laptop and draft the most nerve wracking email of my life.

* * *

FROM: hourtohour . notetonote

TO: bluegreen118

DATE: October 30 at 8:55 PM

SUBJECT: I'm not sorry

Blue,

I'm not sorry for who I am, but I am sorry that you can't seem to get passed that. I know I'm not the hottest guy out there, and I tend to talk everyone's ear off at times, but that's who I am. I'm done apologizing for that. Part of me wants to know your reasoning for not wanting to meet me now, but I think I already know…

Blue, I love you…and I'll say it again- I don't care what you look like or who you are because you'll always be Blue to me. We have such a special relationship, and I never took you for the shallow type, which is probably what upsets me the most about this whole thing. I'm willing to put myself out there and meet you- and to tell my friends- who took me being gay very well, by the way. I bet you didn't even tell your friends… Whatever, I can't make you do things that make you uncomfortable.

Look…Blue, I'm going to the party tomorrow night- I got my Deadpool costume and whether you show up or not will be the answer I need. Either you show up and we start living the life we both want for each other, or you don't…and we call it what it is...

It's up to you, Blue.

Love, Simon

A/N: UGH ANGST. But i'm sure we all know where it's going ;) Enjoy the next coming chapter guys! I don't think there will be too much more for this one, but i'll be sure to make the chapters as long as possible.


	3. I Should Be Hanging From A Web

A/N: Okay, this chapter wasn't as long as I wanted it to be, but here is it! Another one will be coming, Thanks guys! It really helps to have the movie at hand too, cause watching it again gave me ideas I didn't have before!

Masquerade

Chapter 3

I head over to Nick's early with Leah and wait for Abby to show up. Once she's finally there, Leah goes into the kitchen and prepares something quick for us to snack on. She likes to say she's not the mom of the group, but she is sometimes.

"You know…it's weird that this is the first time we don't have matching costumes," Leah avoids eye contact with me as she speaks.

"I know, and I'm sorry…but I can't-"

"Si, I know the reason and it's okay. I'm not butt-hurt or something like that…it's just weird. It's also a weird look into the future of what's to come."

"What do you mean?" I ask, picking up a slice of pizza.

"I don't know…it's senior year, and I feel like everything is changing so fast already…like we're all going to be split up next year and it scares me."

"I know what you mean. I'm excited to start college, but I don't want to leave everyone either," I admit.

"At least you're going away! I'm just staying local. I'm basically going to be reminded of you guys everyday of my life, but you'll be miles and miles away."

"Leah, come on- we'll talk everyday, you know that. There is a thing called Skype remember?" I smile, nudging her with my elbow. "Plus, Abby is going to be there with you, so it's not all bad."

"Yeah, but what happens when you get too busy to talk to me?"

"Not gonna happen," I smirk, biting into the pizza- noticing how she avoids the Abby conversation.

"Oh, sure," Leah rolls her eyes playfully, biting into her own slice of pizza.

It's quiet for a moment and then she looks at me.

"Hey, Si?"

"Yeah?" I look to her.

"What did you mean yesterday by me telling you things too?"

"Oh…Um, well…sometimes I think you hide things from me too when you don't have to."

"Like?" she furrows her brows.

"Um, like how you're feeling…or who you have feelings for?" I say, looking to the corner of the counter top.

"Oh," her voice is small, and I can tell she's embarrassed.

"But you don't have to say anything until you're ready, I just want you to know that I'm here for you and whatever it may be- I don't care. I love you." I say, finally looking back at her. She catches my glance and blushes.

"Si, I-"

"Yo, yo! We ready?" Nick interrupts, storming into the kitchen with Abby in tow. Leah's eyes go directly for the two of them and she nods. I watch her carefully and nod when I realize I haven't acknowledged them yet.

"Let's get this party started!" Abby cheers, pulling on her Halle Berry cat woman mask. Nick slides on his Batman mask and we're off. Nick decided he would 'DD' again for us this year, and drove us over to where the party was being held. This time is wasn't at Garrett's, but at Taylor Metternich's.

Leah clung to her sparkling, multicolored gem-cluttered mask that she picked up last minute and rubbed her fingers over the jewels. She didn't want to go full costume, but in order to enter the house you needed to be wearing something that hid your identity. Taylor was a little too stringent on the rules in my opinion, but it's her party and for free alcohol I guess teenagers will do anything.

When we got inside Garrett was standing by the stairs in Taylor's hallway. He looked above everyone in the crowd and when he spotted us he rushed over.

"Finally! What the hell took you guys so long? Spier, I like the Deadpool," Garrett smiled, tugging his Zorro mask down around his neck.

"Thanks," I say, blushing lightly, gripping the mask in my hands. Leah put her mask on, and something about it made her appear more beautiful than usual, but oddly mysterious behind the gems. Garrett couldn't take his eyes off her, but broke away when Nick asked where Bram was.

"Oh, yeah I texted him and he said he was running a little late. He'll be here though. Come on, let's get our drink on!" Garrett suggested, waving us to follow him.

"Good idea," I sighed. I had checked my email before coming here, but I had nothing from Blue all day. It was hurting a little more today than yesterday, but I still had a bit of hope. As I made my way through the crowd I realized there were several Spiderman's here, and every time I saw one I imagined it to be Blue waiting for me. Wishful thinking I guess.

"Do you think he's here?" Leah asked, gripping onto my arm, whispering loudly in my ear over the music.

"I don't know. He's supposed to be Spiderman, but I've seen several already," I explained, looking around. Leah looked around, spotting the Spiderman's I already saw.

"You don't think it's one of them?"

"I don't know." I shrugged, turning my attention to Garrett, the bartender.

"What do you want?"

"Anything to get me fucked up," I said, and Leah looked at me.

"Si, do you think that's the best idea? What if he comes around, and you're drunk?"

"He's not showing, Leah, forget it," I frowned, taking a drink Garrett handed me. I started drinking it, and choking in the process. It was strong, but soon enough I was drinking enough to not notice the taste anymore.

Bram's Point of View:

By time I arrived at the party, mostly everyone was drunk and having what seemed to be the time of their lives. I slipped on my mask and made my way through the crowd. I pushed past several people in similar costumes and gulped. I really hope this isn't going to backfire on me.

I was told to look for Zorro, and once I saw Garrett's hat I move toward him. When I approached I found him along with everyone else from our lunch table…including a rather intoxicated Simon.

"Hey," I said, pulling the mask up. Garrett cheered when I placed my hand on his shoulder and turned to see me.

"What took you so long?" he asked, looking me over. "Damn look at you in that costume. Very uh…formfitting, yeah?" Garrett nudged me with a wink. I blushed, and looked away.

"Stop it." I mumbled, "why is Simon so drunk?"

"He hasn't stopped drinking since he got here. But I've been replacing his drinks with half water, so he's starting to sober up." Garrett explained. "Poor guy is really bummed, that guy never showed himself yet." He explained, and instantly I felt the pang of regret for not getting here sooner.

"Gar, can I talk to you?" I asked, pulling him away from everyone else. He followed, and when we were in an empty hallway, far from everyone else I took a deep breath.

"What's up?" he crossed his arms, waiting for me to talk.

"I have something I've been wanting to tell you, and I can't keep hiding it cause I-"

"Garrett, we're gonna start karaoke, you need to set it up!" Taylor came into the hallway, and took his attention off me.

"Okay, be right there!" he shot back, turning back to me.

"Come on, Greenfeld, spit it out," Garrett teased, tapping my shoulder.

"Ugh… just go do that, and we'll talk later," I sighed, leaving the hallway. Garrett called my name, but I never looked back. I put my mask on, and followed the crowd to the kitchen. I grabbed myself a drink, and kept a close eye on Simon the whole night. When I noticed his energy decreasing I decided to swoop in.

"Hey, Si. You okay?" I asked, walking over to him. Simon turned around to see me without my mask on, and looked me over.

"Bram!" he nearly yelled with a deep slur to his voice. This cheeky smile formed over his face when he finally realized I was standing before him, and for some reason drunk Simon felt comfortable hugging me. I held onto him, but I knew not to read into it.

"Have enough?" I chuckled, pushing back at him. He wobbled back, but kept his balance.

"Plenty, wan' some?" he yelled again, holding out his red cup.

"That's for sure," I said, taking his drink.

"Wait, thas' my cup," he slurred, reaching for it.

"Let's get some air, Si. You need a break," I said, guiding him out to the patio. Once outside, and the crisp air hit him, the drunkenness seemed to over take him. I helped him to a chair on the patio and sat in front of him on the pull out ottoman. Simon rested back against the floral cushion and ran a hand through his hair.

"Leah has my mask," he said lazily, looking behind him.

"It's okay. You don't need it," I laughed. "Everyone can tell you're Deadpool."

"And you're-" Simon said, looking at my bodysuit. "Spiderman?" he tilted his head.

"Uh, yeah…I am," I bit at my lip. Simon began laughing, and I couldn't tell if he had just figured it out or-

"This night keeps getting better- and better," he said, throwing his head back. He scrubbed his hands over his face, and continued to laugh.

"It does?" I said. The feeling of hope was rising in my chest little by little, until Simon picked his head up and tears were streaming down his cheeks.

"Si…are you-"

"Everything reminds me of him…everything, Bram," he cried. "I spent a whole year of my life talking to this guy and for what? For him t-to disappear last minute? I mean…I don't get what's so wrong about me, ya know? So wrong that he doesn't want to meet me."

"Nothing! Nothing is wrong with you, Simon!" I pressed, inching closer to him from the ottoman. I wanted so badly to take his hands into mine, and console him like a boyfriend would- but I couldn't do that. He'd freak out, and probably hate me more. I wanted to wipe away his tears, and make the pain stop-

"He's a fucking coward, and I hate him," he suddenly spat, rubbing his forehead, trying to hold back his tears.

"You know what, he is a coward, but he shouldn't be because you're worth everything and more, Simon." I said, realizing my words were way too personal for me to be saying. I tucked the panic away and decided it was now or never. I placed a hand to his knee, which grabbed his attention immediately, and swallowed hard. "This guy you've been emailing- he's not perfect, and even though he tries to be, and wants to be- he'll never be. He does things that he regrets, but he also does things he knows he'll never regret. He's a coward, but for all the right reasons. He doesn't want to disappoint you, and instead of talking it out- he hides. He doesn't have all the right words like it seems, but he tries extra hard to impress you." I continue on, and Simon's hanging onto every word coming out of my mouth.

"When he's around you, he's nervous and afraid- but when you leave he beats himself up over how quiet he gets. He can't help it when you look the way you do. He can't help the feeling he gets when you smile, or talk everyone's ear off," I chuckle to myself for bringing up his latest email. "And he _never_ wants you to apologize for you being you- because he loves you, and wouldn't want you to change for anything," I finish, staring into his emotion filled, moon-gray eyes.

"H-how do you know all that?" it comes out as nearly a whisper.

"Because the person who has been writing you for a year would know," I smiled shyly, keeping my hand planted on his knee.

"I realize…but how do _you_ know?" he slurred through his soft words.

I sigh, rolling my eyes briefly, "Simon…"

"Wait…you're dressed as Spiderman…and you-" Simon trailed off, and my eyes grew wide. He figured it out. He looked away from me and down at his lap. His eyes searched back and forth as the information was flooding his head. He focused on the hand gripping his knee, and swiftly sat up in his seat. I withdrew my hand urgently, and tucked it away in my lap.

"Y-you're…you're him? Y-you're Blue?"

"Yeah…I'm Blue." I nod, swallowing hard again. I can't read his expression, but he seems taken aback by the whole thing. "I'm sorry for the way I left things, but I'm here and I-"

"Cute Bram Greenfeld is Blue…" he mumbles, and I can't tell if he's trying to get himself to understand or he's finally understood and now he's trying it out. The added 'cute' ignites my ears, and my chest feels like it could burst.

"Are you disappointed that it's me?" I finally ask, realizing there is no better time than any to ask the question.

"Disappointed?" Simon asks, frowning at his own words. He's quiet for a moment before shaking his head. "No…I'm not disappointed at all."

"Really?" I ask. He shakes his head, and sits forward. My heart nearly jumps out of my chest because I think he's leaning in, but really he gets up and unsteadily starts to walk away.

"Si…Simon?" I watch as me makes his way back into the house. He steadiest himself in the doorframe, looks around and then starts inside. I quickly get up, and run after him.

"Simon!" I holler, following the top of his head. When I approach him, he's talking to Leah, and she hands him over his mask. She's wearing a tight frown, and rubs his arm.

"Simon, wait-" I say, grabbing his arm before he's able to walk away. "You said you weren't disappointed!" I strained my words, confused by his actions.

"I'm not disappointed that it's you, Bram…I just need a minute, and I don't really want to talk right now-" he stumbled away, bumping into people as he pushed through the crowd. I stood defeated by my own mistake, and slowly turned my attention to a very confused looking Leah.

"Are you Blue?" she asks, and I give her a frustrated sigh before nodding absentmindedly. I trail away from the crowd and run straight into Taylor.

"Bram! Mask on, what do you think this is," she giggled, grabbing my mask and fixing it onto my head.

"Thanks," I grumble, fixing it to sit right on my face. I walk toward the front door and find my way outside. I figured Simon would have gone somewhere inside the house, but there he was on the front porch. He was leaning his head against the post connected to the porch with his hands resting in his lap. His mask is covering his face, and I know he's trying everything to ignore me.

"Hey…I know you needed a minute, but can I sit here?" I ask, waiting for him to respond. When he didn't I just took a seat anyway and stretched out my legs in front of me.

"I feel like this is so much easier to do with a mask on," I chuckle, feeling the fabric over my face. "Look, I'm really sorry about what I did… I shouldn't have disappeared, or made you feel like it was your fault that I didn't want to meet you…truthfully I was scared that you would be disappointed that it was me…so I got nervous- like usual, and decided to do what I tend to do best- freak out and run away. I'm not always like that though...just around you. I don't know, somehow you manage to shut me up with just a look. I didn't think it could be possible, but it was- still is actually. I get so tongue-tied because you're you. I'm so attracted to you, and I can't even believe you thought that it was because I wasn't." I look at Simon who still isn't saying anything.

"God, I could be functioning normally, and then you walk in the room and everything- including my ability to speak or act normally shuts down. In that very moment I'm more in-tune to you than ever. I know this sounds creepy, but when I go quiet like that…I think it's my way of observing you and trying to learn things about you uninterrupted. I guess what I'm trying to say is-"

"Bram?" he speaks up. I stop and look over at him, but he's unmoving. I furrow my brows, and touch his shoulder.

"Si?" I ask. I hear someone clear their throat behind me, and I look over my shoulder to see Simon standing there with his mask in his hands. I turn back to the Deadpool slumped over beside me and my mouth falls open- which Simon can't see. Thank god he can't see my expression because this has to be the most embarrassing thing to happen to me so far in my whole life. I quickly get up, and ignore the fact that I was pouring my heart out to some unconscious guy.

"Um…well this is embarrassing." I say, and he still looks serious for a moment. His stern expression fades into that of an amused one, and then he's laughing. "Did you happen to hear any of that?" I ask, rubbing a hand over the back of my neck. He looks me up and down, and I remember suddenly that I'm in a skin-tight spandex suit. It takes all of me to hide my vulnerability in front of him, but then I look at him and his suit also hugs all the right places on his body… I become weaker than ever in the presence of Simon Spier. The hottest Deadpool around.

"I…did actually…I was standing there for a while. I saw you walk out, but then you sat down with that guy- so I got curious enough to watch you. I have to say, that was the best thing I ever did," he chuckled, wringing the fabric of his mask in his hands.

"I'm so glad I'm dressed as Spiderman right now…if you could see how hard I'm blushing," I laughed, touching the fabric clinging around my throat.

"So…did you mean everything you said? That I make you nervous?" he twitched, glancing to the side uncomfortably.

"Yes, but in the best ways," I add, drawing his attention back to me.

"…Bram…I have to be honest, but…hold on." Simon stops to put his mask on, and I can hear him take a deep breath. "This makes me feel like we're emailing since I can't see your face," he laughs, and I join him because I agree that it feels easier.

"I feel like it might be easier to get out what I want to say, so…I've had a crush on you since I first saw you. I never thought in a million years that one day I'd be standing here talking to you the way I am because I seriously thought you were straight. But even in my wildest fantasies of you turning out to be gay, I didn't see you liking me back."

"How could I not?" I interrupt. "Simon, I'm kind of really into you…like so into you it hurts."

"Are you sure?"

"So sure." I give an affirmative nod.

"Well in that case…I'm really into you too," he says, and I can hear the smile in his voice- but I want to see it. I step closer to him, and reach up to his face. I get my fingers under the hem of his mask and roll it up just above his nose. He's smiling and I can see a bright crimson blush spread over his cheeks beneath where the mask is still covering. He reaches up to me and mirrors my actions. My mask is resting on the bridge of my nose, and I can't help but smile like an idiot. I bite my lip, and within a seconds time Simon's closer to me and we're inches apart.

"I've been dreaming of this moment…is it okay if I kiss you?" he says, and the alcohol is faded on his breath. He's sober enough from what I can tell, and even though I took a few shots myself I'm sober enough to know I actually want this.

"I feel like I should be hanging upside down from a web, but yeah…this will do-" I say before closing the space between us. My lips connect with his, and it feels like heaven. I'm on cloud 9, and he's touching me tenderly around my waist. I bring my hands up to grab hold of his face and further the kiss.

We pull apart for a moment, and when we do we're both smiling widely.

"Fantasies about me being gay, huh?" I tease, biting my lip. I run my thumb over his cheek, and he blushes again. We go back to kissing, and it's more passionate than our first.

"I found them! Oh wait…No…what?" I heard Garrett's voice, and it breaks me away from Simon. I look up and see Garrett cocking his head in our direction. I never got to tell him, and he probably doesn't think it's me.

"Wrong Spiderman, sorry dudes- get back to it-" Garrett backs off, and looks to be heading back inside.

"Garrett wait!" I call out and he stops. He steps back onto the porch and I remove my mask. Simon takes off his and Leah steps out beside Garrett just as we're both revealed.

"Greenfeld…you're gay?" Nick asks, peering out the door.

"Wait a minute…you're the guy Simon was upset over?" Garrett questions, pointing his finger towards me incriminatingly.

"Y-yeah," I blush, taking Simon's hand. He laces his fingers between mine and he's smiling.

"Holy shit!" Garrett expressed, throwing his hands to his head nearly knocking the hat off his head.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner."

"Hey you probably had your reasons...I'm just so happy that Spier was able to finally find his guy. It being you kind of makes this hella cute." Garrett smiles, walking toward us. "Get in here!" he says, sweeping us up into a hug. We hug him and Abby comes bouncing out of the house. She jumps in on our hug and before we know it we've got the whole gang in a group hug. I don't know what I was so worried about…this is better than I imagined it to be.

A/N: More to come! Hope you enjoyed this one! A lot of Bram- but I'm not complaining. I love to write him.


End file.
